Monday, September 21, 2009

Having my mixed beverage and drinking it, too.

Several months ago, upon the the reccomendation of (cough cough, whisper) Gwyneth Paltrow (end whisper), I read a book called Spent. It was all about how not to be tired anymore! In fact, you could be happy and fabulous and possibly grow up to look like Gwyneth Paltrow.

Say what you must, but I'd take Gwyneth over my sad little frumpy state any day.

So I read the book. Here were three of the main tenets: No sugar. No alcohol. No caffeine.

I laughed my butt off at numbers two and three. No alcohol OR caffeine? Surely you jest. Nobody actually does they? And...why would I? Those two things help me when I'm feeling Spent.

But, I decided that I'd try the whole no sugar thing. After reading the book, I felt I could at least give it a try. My life, at that point, had become one big nap. All I ever felt like doing was sleeping. Everyone kept yelling THYROID at me, but it always checked out perfectly normal. There had to be something else. There had to be another way.

Note: When I say I felt sleepy, I don't mean the "oh I can take a nap" sleepy. I'm talking about CRAZY tired. I call these my "tin foil hat days," days where I'm completely unable to function at all. Most of the time, I was incredibly grumpy, and I was sure the world was out to get me.

On tin foil hat days, you could find me rocking back and forth in a closet, ranting about who really killed JFK.

The first three days were brutal. I just felt horrible. I remember standing in line at the grocery store, totally in a No Sugar Bad Mood and thinking to myself "just get through three days. One more day." And I did...and then, I felt better.

While I still have two triggers that make me incredibly sleepy (stress and heat), I don't feel as run-down all the time. But what about alcohol? You see...I like to make mixed drinks. I'm not a beer person. But...most of those mixed drinks were so full of sugar, they seemed as if I were licking lollypops.

Granted, they were vodka-laced lollypops, but you get the idea. 

Then I came up with a magical solution: ALL NATURAL ORANGE JUICE! Mixed with Vodka! Not from concentrate!

So, now when I pull out my Simply Orange juice along with my vodka, I don't feel as if I'm loading myself up with added sugar. (Natural sugars do not count.) I can almost say I'm doing something good for my health, as it has CALCIUM included.

Calcium! For strong bones! Who doesn't need strong bones?

The best part of all this, besides not being sleepy, still enjoying alcohol and getting in an extra source of calcium into my diet? I've managed to keep those 10 pounds I lost off.

Sure, I may not be Gwyneth skinny, but perhaps if she had a cocktail or two, she could totally lose that constipated look she spots in photos.


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